Marriage vows revisited

About three months ago brief discussion with my uncle on the wedding vows we normally use at Christian weddings sparked a tiny flame. 

Half of the things which we say and anticipate will be a part of our married lives are downright pessimistic under Grace. For example, we say, “to have and to hold in sickness and in health, for better or for worse..”

Clearly this is like cursing a union before it even begins. Sure the argument that “anything can happen” and that “we should consider all possibilities” may hold true for unbelievers; but for the children of the Most High God such a statement is absurd.

Beloved Yeshua suffered and died one of the most painful and agonizing forms of death just so that we, today, will be free from all sin, sickness and worries. So to declare or even hope to encounter such things is wrong. The writer of Hebrews says, “…and who have fallen away; it is impossible, I say, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify the Son of God afresh to themselves and put Him to an open shame.” (Hebrews 6:6)

Beloved, repent!! Metanoea!! Change the way you think!! Because the work of Christ is complete. It was one sacrifice, offered once, for all our sins and it was accepted as perfect by the Father. So if there was any sin which God had not forgiven that day at the cross, He (the Father) could not have raised Jesus from the dead. So perfect health, prosperity and peace of mind are blood bought gifts given to us freely by faith in our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

“Till death do us part…” is another inappropriate phrase. 

Beloved, for a believer the word death is invalid. Believers pass on into eternal life. The “zoe” life which the bible speaks of begins when this mortal life ends. And the Saviour who died to reconcile all mankind to the Father is not in the business of parting us from our loved ones. In 1 Corinthians 13:12, Paul says, “For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall fully know even as I also am fully known.” Then when we are perfected in heaven we will know each other, all the painful memories will be gone but all the good times will be enhanced.

Today when we are separated from those we love…parents…siblings…spouses…we feel void, incomplete and alone. 

Eve was made because God saw that Adam was alone (Genesis 2:18). And Adam loved Eve, because we see when man fell and the woman was cursed Adam declared over his wife that her name shall be “Chavvah” (Eve) which means life (Genesis 3:20). Wow, imagine they had just lost their immortality and this guy names his wife “life”. I believe that they know each other in heaven and I am sure that we all will know our loved ones too.

Beloved, the covenant of marriage is holy. God made man and woman to be with each other.

Paul explains the deeper significance of marriage in Ephesians 5, mentioning what Jesus, the Bridegroom, did for His bride, the Church. Here husbands are instructed to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). Christ died for His bride so that He may present her without blemish before God, by the washing of water by His Word. (Ephesians 5:26-27) Husbands are the priests of their households. It is their duty to wash their families with the “washing of water by the word”; to intercede on their behalf and to be the representative of the love of Jesus in their families. Amen!

Wives are told to submit to their husbands (Ephesians 5:22) not as slaves rather as worthy equals. The picture is of the Holy Spirit and the renewed spirits of the redeemed (2 Corinthians 5:17). The unsaved spirits of unbelievers cannot stand before Spirit of God, let alone receive from Him but when a sinner repents he is made a new creation. This new creature (spirit) is perfected by the work of Yeshua and can stand face to face and receive from the Spirit of God. Hallelujah!!!

“for this cause a man shall leave his father and mother and be united with his wife…”(Ephesians 5:31). The cause is simple, beloved. The cause is LOVE. Jesus is LOVE. God is LOVE. Marriages on earth represent His Love for us, His Bride.

So marriage vows under grace would sound something like as follows:

I take my beloved <name of your spouse> as my lawfully wedded husband/wife

To have and to hold for all eternity

In the abundance of health and happiness

For better moving on towards the best

Till we are perfected in love when we stand face to face with the author and perfecter of our love, Jesus Christ

Amen

Beloved this is a truth, and Jesus said that the truth always sets us free. Feel free to renew your wedding vows with your spouse if you are led. For those who are not married yet, declare these promises in your heart so that when God brings the right person to you, you will declare life over them in Jesus’ name. 

Yes, beloved, when we all get to Heaven, what a day of rejoicing that will be. We will rejoice in the arms of our Lord and celebrate with all whom we love. It will be a grand grand reunion.

Shalom!